Friday May 8th 2020.

Thanks to Jeff for doing the weekly review last week; EmCee has said he will have a go next week, but if anyone else fancies a go let me know, you’re very welcome, as I feel I need a bit of a break sometimes.

Alun came to us in sound only due to his cheapskate broadband being unable to cope with his bulk on screen. Being VE day, he kicked the night off with one wot ‘e ‘rote 33 years ago, “Lest we Forget”.

A couple from me were preceded by a fantastic gag. Others seemed not to agree, possibly thinking it was a bit childish. Just for them, here’s another :- A Higgs Boson walks in to a church. The priest rushes out and shouts “Get out, we don’t want your sort in here!” The reply was “But without me, you can’t have mass!” Sorry, if you don’t get it but I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain. One of my songs was about our generation’s inability to shake off the old Imperial systems of measurement.

This week’s quiz.

If Janet and John go into a shop and buy a bar of chocolate for 6d, 2 penny Arrow bars, 5 pennorth of “Sports” and a Beano (3d), how many condoms could they buy at 10d each if they had a ten bob note?

Apparently Mike is fed up of singing “D Day Dodgers. Tough. We still love it.

Jeff was in his pirate outfit, supposedly to prevent reflections from his receding hairline. His gag was REALLY crap. He had cocaine running round his brain, which may have explained it.

Mel is always a quality turn. (Quality can be bad as well as good). Lilli Marlene was followed by “A boy named Sue”, done in his best Home Counties accent. Mel was either quicker on his feet than you would expect from a man of his size, or he had several virtual backgrounds; at one point he was coming to us from a gents toilet, another he was in a deserted Tynewydd.

David Hytch sang “Spring 1919” and “Lord it’s hard to be humble”. I have a sneaky feeling Jeff had thought of doing this as well.

Geoff Ludden thought the Bank Holiday should have been a workers’ day and sang “Peterloo”. Not sure many would have agreed with him, but he also did “Green Fields of France”. Apparently we’ve been in Lockdown longer than France was in WW2. The French also, to be fair , stayed in their houses and clapped from their windows.

John Killion was back to top form after last week’s awful “Damper” song. “John Willy’s Horse” always creases me. Make sure you don’t miss it on this week’s recording.

We saw T Gwyn sing a Lenny Cohen piece, but technical problems intervened with this week’s poem.

Ash has been with us online for several weeks now, although we hadn’t seen him at the club for ages. Tonight he treated us a lovely piece on guitar. We want more.

Brian has been self-harming and cutting bits of his fingers off so wasn’t able to do a recording this week. We should have had a couple of songs recorded in 2012, but technology once again failed us and , although we heard him, we only saw a picture of a plate(?). The subject of much conjecture on the chat line.

Round again for one each. What’s happened to Helen? I enjoyed her songs from Canada. Is she still helping police with their enquiries re the alleged ingestion of her husband by a polar bear?

The highlight of the night was without doubt the appearance of Margaret’s pussy, if you were watching on Gallery view. She spent some time fondling it (one of the biggest I’ve seen). I bet it sheds hair all over the house, Margaret.

Throughout the night we had noticed the presence of some one called “Ineda Baba”, who chose not to speak when Andrew invited him to tell us us about himself. He looked fairly slim, but the picture quality wasn’t the best, and I’d remarked to Jeff in a private chat that he looked like a jihadi in some sort of mask and long hair (but not the jihadi with a poor sex life – “Seldom Bin Laid” (every one’s a winner today!). At 10.25 just as we were winding down, some one finally got it –  “I need a barber”. Nice one.

Quiz Answer. They would not buy condoms as they were Catholics.

A couple of things to look at this weekend, if you’re not off to the beach for a barbie with your mates. There’s the recording from last night and also Andrew, who works pretty tirelessly for the club, has started a Desert Island Discs thing  called “Music and Memories”, which will be available on the website under that category. Being a mug, I was first to “volunteer”, so you can hear the intimate details of my life and how it has affected my musical inclinations. There are 5 tracks of mine (fast forward) and 5 cracking tracks from others at the club. Probably fast forward Nick Jackson’s as well.

Here are the links.

And Friday night:-

One Response to “Friday May 8th 2020.”

  1. Andrew the Younger Says:

    It’s not a plate. It’s one of the roof lanterns in the Fitzwilliam Museum, Cambridge, seen from the admittedly unusual position of lying on the floor under it.

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